pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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