haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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