their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Randomize