Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize