Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize