I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
