she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
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