the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
