They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
