But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
