What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
