What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
well, you know. whores of a feather.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize