i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Randomize
