The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
this boner is exhausting
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
