tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
