Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
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