how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
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