Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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