we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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