So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
How does one acquire holy water?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
