Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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