nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
