whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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