I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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