omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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