Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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