Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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