Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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