I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
