I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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