your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
