i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Just cropdusted the office
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize