Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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