it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
