He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
