Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
bring money and cleavage
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
