doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
