you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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