I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Randomize