I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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