Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
