shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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