"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
