I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
