erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
