I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
