hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize
