She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
