Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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