alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
