yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
